A Code To Uphold

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “I Walk the Line.”

This code I have been holding since junior high is pretty simple and yet not that easy to follow. After living for this long with my partially expanded awareness of people’s behavior, I come to realize that people won’t be as silent as you want. I was trained to not talk too much, not to brag about myself (since there is nothing to brag about), not to start conversation and joke around if not necessary, and one last thing: since I am a male, I am not recommended to bother anything about female unless it is health/scientific/norm issues.

Pretty strict, eh? I though so but later I understand that people tend to talk what they want and sometimes without regarding to whom they are speaking. One person has clearly stated something that he/she dislikes and somehow it is okay for another person to joke about it. A specified matter has been declared not to be in public conversation and yet, with fully functioning senses people just talk about it in open areas with loud and clear voice. Where is their sense of silence?

Later, I see that people tend to give hints about what they perceive as secret. If you told people about one secret number, say 13, then trustworthy people won’t talk about anything related to this number. They might as well be totally quiet. But the other kind would find themselves innocent by saying,

I have a small prime number. Consider it bad luck number.

They won’t be bothered if this might cause the supposed-to-be-secret-story blown up like a nuclear warhead hitting its target. Their response would be all like,

Hey, I didn’t say anything. I just said prime number and bad luck.

Guess what, people are not all as dumb as you think they are.

Anyway, keep it silence won’t be enough to contain my sanity here. So, I fixed it by adding another sentence that might prevent a spark from happening. If you want to blow something, you need a spark of fire and a fuel, if you want to make the explosion big. I have on my hand a ton of fuel and small material ready to explode. One thing remains is a spark. This is still within my authority whether to light the fuse or not. So, until now I have holding some codes, one of them complement with the first one is what Captain MacMillan said in one of his mission in Chernobyl.

Keep a low profile and hold your fire.

Why did you not do this?

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Plead the Fifth.”

There are several question I hate to hear and some other statements too. After graduated from college long hours of studying, struggling just to barely exceed the passable mark, I was forced to face reality. Tired? Yes. But, if that was calming situation when I was left alone for few weeks deciding what to do, that’d be great. Instead of that, people came over in rush and asking,

Hey, why don’t you do (fill in with some kind of jobs, works, or matters a fresh graduate would normally do or wish)? The salary is good, the location is well-known, etc..

I understand that people just want the best for me, including future, housing plan, jobs (or even a spouse?). I really appreciated that all, so much. Thank you. But, would you people just let me take a breath or two? Not literally, but it’d be great if you all just let me finish my after-graduation-ceremony administration things. I can’t apply for work as a fresh graduate without my bachelor certification, now can I?

Say, I chose one particular job at particular company. Then when I got my step on the front door of my home, they were coming again.

Why did you even choose that place? Why didn’t you choose this (fill in with a better work with higher salary and prestige)? I’m sure that you’d be ….

After a month, the phone would ring and then multiple questions would rain down from speaker while I was confused, thinking if there was still a right answer left to give. There I said,

Okay, if that so, why don’t you take the path and show me the way? Put on my shoes, carry my backpack, do my daily jobs, and send those application emails to this and that big and prestigious company you want me to work for. Oh, yeah. Don’t forget to take this paper from this person and … Ah, you want me to do it by myself? So why are you still talking and arguing over this matter?

No, no. If I say things like that, I’d probably get scolded by elders in my family and friends because of being impolite. The point is suggesting something is really-really-really helpful. It’s is indeed helpful. But sometimes, all I desire is support and a pat on my back while saying, come on, you can do it. Not being accused of doing and choosing wrong matters over and over again. I don’t what way leads to which way. All I can do is trying and see if it goes to better life or not, if it is okay or not.

I am not saying that questioning my choice is bad. I mean, sometimes, I do need to have someone as bouncing wall so I may see things in different angles.

So, instead of hammering me with this accusing question and statement about how really wrong and stupid I was because of doing and choosing my current jobs, education, and life, why don’t you help me? Share your experience of your old ages, tell me if you have premonition over stuffs I desire, and also wish and pray to Him for our best in life? So I may choose the right path and don’t come out as being stupid and worthless?

Oh yeah, I forgot one thing. If you people want to shoot me with question about how I am going to get married and related subjects, don’t bother. I won’t answer this kind of question. Not that I am being arrogant and prideful of being single. I just don’t have the answer other than, today is not the time.

Good day.